Hilary Swank Says She's Not Getting Divorced Because Chad Lowe Looks Like A Girl
Finally, the kid gloves come off. When it was announced that Hilary Swank and some guy named Chad Lowe ( i.e. Nobody) were getting divorced, speculation was rampant as to why. As usual science has the answer.
She says it is "substance abuse" that led to the downfall of their fairy-tale romance and not that he is kind of a skinny dweeb with no prospects and she has an Oscar and looks like this:
We all know the real reason she left him is because she wants to step up to someone who does not look like her little sister. Studies have shown that if you look more feminine than your wife, she will find a man instead. Science rules. Swank recognizes she erred by not consulting science the first time around. Says Swank: "I make mistakes; I'm not some squeaky-clean person here."
You heard it here first, folks. She needs discipline and is a dirty girl. The line forms after me.