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Top 10 Reasons My Faster-Than-Light Car Rules:

10) Stephen Hawking always wants to carpool.

9) Breaking the laws of physics is only a misdemeanor in most states.

8) Traffic enforcement is pretty much limited to cops with Ph.D.'s in Quantum Physics.

7) Bugs - they never see you comin'.

6) I can get to the good hookers before Charlie Sheen.

5) I made a fortune selling pizza with the slogan "It's there before you order or it's free!"

4) I sleep until noon and still get to work by 8:00am!

3) I'm never in the car long enough to hear an entire Madonna song.

2) My cigar butts don't land in the back seat, they land in last week!

... and the number one cool thing about my faster-than-light car is ...

1) I get a license plate that reads "ME = MC^2"

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The Second Best Way To Enjoy The Super Bowl



Okay, say you can't travel to Detroit and hang out with stripper and alcohol connoisseur Tommy Lee during Super Bowl weekend. And further say you were busy and only have 14 minutes to find out what happened during the entire game, including commercials.

Welcome to Hart & Larsson, who filmed a girl named Andrea watching the Super Bowl, doing play by play and living her life during the epic battle between the greatest team in the NFL and someone else.

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She uses a fake chicken and a ceramic doll to show you the position of the teams on the field, she eats snacks, she holds up placards during commercials to rate their enjoyment factor ( "Effective", "Entertaining", "A Waste of $2.5 Million"), she paints on her wall. She even does a half-time show with lights and everything. This is sheer cinematic poetry.

Oh yeah, and she changes clothes. A lot. And has a decent butt. That's right, just this once I am recommending a movie without any nudity.

Don't get used to it.

Watch a hot chick watch the Super Bowl in 14 minutes here.

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