Frustrated French Women Would Rather Grope A Statue You know French men are small when French women would rather rub a statue than endure yet another boring round of intercourse with penises so small that American 5-year olds make fun of them. Kissing the lips and putting a flower in the hat of this statue is supposed to be good luck but the fake enlarging of the groin is what really attracts the attention of lusty French women. So they have been rubbing it. A lot. So much so that a new sign warns; "Any damage caused by graffiti or indecent rubbing will be prosecuted." Supposedly, French men are very charming and this makes up for their lack of man-junk. I guess I could be a French man. But I would have to lose some muscle mass and shrink my penis to half-size. Without those changes, I just couldn't endure hearing all of those "owie owie" noises from French women - they only like big penises on their statues. They should just be quiet and make me a cheese plate.