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Top 10 Reasons My Faster-Than-Light Car Rules:

10) Stephen Hawking always wants to carpool.

9) Breaking the laws of physics is only a misdemeanor in most states.

8) Traffic enforcement is pretty much limited to cops with Ph.D.'s in Quantum Physics.

7) Bugs - they never see you comin'.

6) I can get to the good hookers before Charlie Sheen.

5) I made a fortune selling pizza with the slogan "It's there before you order or it's free!"

4) I sleep until noon and still get to work by 8:00am!

3) I'm never in the car long enough to hear an entire Madonna song.

2) My cigar butts don't land in the back seat, they land in last week!

... and the number one cool thing about my faster-than-light car is ...

1) I get a license plate that reads "ME = MC^2"

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CA Congressman Wants To Put Child Safety Warning -- On Candy



Congressman Mike Honda can point to six deaths related to candy ... a number he feels is too high. I managed to survive childhood quite nicely without warning labels on candy and it seems a shame to send parents into a panic because of a few dumb kids. The Congressman's bill, if passed, would be a death sentence for some candy manufacturers ... and it would lead to others spending money on lobbyists to keep the labels off their goods. Oh wait, Honda is a democrat ... of course that is the plan. Tax dollars to create a regulatory agency examining all of the candy and lobbyists giving him money to keep their names off the list.

Next he can propose dropping the speed limit to 5 MPH because the tens of thousands of deaths per year are 'too many.'



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