The Science Endorsement: Final Fu

Don't get me wrong, the show is complete crap, even if it does have young Ernie Reyes. They don't even use AAU rules, which would be bad enough ... they have more like pussified AAU rules, which is like being the shortest guy in a family of midgets. I never liked AAU tournaments because you couldn't punch to the face. They were okay with you doing a hook kick and spinning someone's head around like a scene from The Exorcist, they just don't want you to do it with your hands. So why endorse some crap show on MTV2, of all places? Michelle Spencer, that's why. She's too young for scientists though, like most women, she will insist age doesn't matter. But she looks like this and that's all she needs to make us happy from a distance, really: Well, that and the ability to make pie crusts. Because pie crusts are a b%tch. She's majoring in nutrition at UNR so you know that means she can throw together a terrific pie. And a pretty good kick. She lives in Reno so maybe we have to waive the age thing, just this once.